Her grip

Hands up and open. “I surrender all,” we sang out.

I stood with hands extended. Open. Flat. Outstretched. Facing up. Empty. 

Anything I tried to hold that way could easily fall, crash to the ground. 

Maybe that was the point.

I noticed a sense of rest on my hands as I didn’t strive to hold onto anything in particular, but just held them out. Expectant, I suppose.

See, the thing is, hands like that can’t hold tight to anything…but they are also ready to receive anything. 

Picture hands gripping a phone. Or a handful of grapes. An apple. A pile of folded laundry. 

Your item is safe, secure. Not going anywhere. Your hands have ensured you won’t lose it. 

And yet…what if something else comes along, but your hands are too full, too distracted, too tired…and you miss it?

Hands open…it keeps your hands ready to receive the next gift.

But.

The ability to receive the next gift is fully dependent on what kind of hold you already have. To be ready to receive…hand posture is everything. If I’m tightly holding onto something, even I want to release it and grab the new gift, timing will be off, and I’ll miss it. Or maybe I’ll be so focused on keeping safe what I already have, and I won’t even notice the good new gift. 

What would happen if I kepy my hands loose and open all the time? What does this look like?

Enjoying the present gift loosely…not clinging to it as my source…being grateful for it but ready and willing to release it when the time comes…

What’s tricky is…I usually don’t realize what kind of grip I have until what I am holding is forced out of my hands. Yanked, torn and removed by force. 

Very rarely will you find this girl releasing anything with peace and rest. I guess that tells you what kind of grip I typically have, huh? 

This action, like so many others for me, is based in fear. If I let it go, how will I know I will receive something to replace it? How will I ever be happy if I let it go? What if I let it go and it is replaced…but I want the original back? What if letting go wrecks my life and I’m the only one to blame? What if this is all there is? 

The scarcity mindset screams at me as I write. 

When did I start believing the lie that the world won’t have enough for me? That unless I fight on my own to secure my own way, I’ll be screwed? That I alone care for me and thus must manipulate and control things to make life as I want it to be? 

When did I stop trusting that my Creator cared for me exponentially beyond any other (including my own self-absorption) …and as such He would continue to ensure a truly good life for me? 

“A truly good life” is where the rubber meets the road though. My idea of good and His often look radically different. 

And I’m again reminded to check my hands. 

Hands gripped tight…a heart of fear and control, I’ve gotta make it happen or I’ve lost. 
Hands open and loose…a heart that trusts, rests and expectantly waits for the future to be even better than what is currently before my eyes. 

Definitely a class I have failed multiple times…as of yet still attempting to pass.

But awareness is the first step to victory. 

Trudging forward…I drop my baggage, gingerly stretch out my hands, and wait expectantly for the Giver of good gifts to do something remarkable. 

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